Harper's Retirement Plans - Week 39 - Jan 23-30

I'm not even joking.  I saw "Harper's RetirementAgenda..." and I got really excited.  Unfortunately, they're just talking about his upcoming attempts to kill Pensions/Old Age Security.  It's funny that my generation has kind of grown up with the phrase "...but that won't be around when you retire anyhow."

Canada is actually catching on that the War on Crime is a bit of a joke.  What's going to happen now with public opinion changing?

This is why the Conservatives have it wrong on campaign financing.  Look at what has happened in the US over SOPA.  Essentially, Chris Dodd, ex-Senator and current head of the MPAA, has suggested that he will withdraw political support and dollars from Obama as he didn't support SOPA/PIPA.  It seems reasonable that you support politicians that hold values in which you believe in.  It seems reasonable that you stop supporting them if all of a sudden your values no longer line up.  It seems unreasonable that you pay them huge sums of money to get legislation that favours you and then threaten to withdraw future funding if you don't get your way.  That sounds like...gosh...a bribe?  In fact, somebody has launched a petition to have him investigated.

 Oh.  Tony Clement!  He tweets "As usual NDP confusing recommending with choosing."  (Which isn't really even a coherent sentence) Stupid NDP and their inability to grasp semenatics!  I didn't choose to sleep with that prosititute.  I simply gave her some money and recommended that she sit on my lap.  Naked.

Steve-O talks about something that I actually agree with, a revamp of the SRED program.  My experience with it is that companies go about their business and hire somebody to write things up in a way that allows for them to claim money from the Government.  I was shocked by the things we were able to claim for implementing technology invented by somebody else.


Richard Branson announces that he believes the "International War on Drugs" is kind of silly and should be stopped.  Which is a pretty ballsy proclamation.

Ducking and Weaving - Week 30 - Nov 21-28

So, people have figured out that you're a liar.  Tony Clement appears to get caught red-handed in the G8 spending debacle.  I really appreciate that there is a spelling mistake in the letter that his consituency office sent out seeking projects.  Of course, somehow the Conservatives will figure out a way to express outrage and blame the question answerer.

A story about the conditions of a James Bay reserve.  There's some interesting points raised in the comments.  I think this specific issue should be treated as a symptom rather than the problem.  But if this isn't a sign that our system in Canada is broken, I'm not sure what is.

Nobody is saying that the $47-Billion stimulus spend was a bad idea...they're just saying that we probably should have figured out a way to measure the effects of the spending.  The Conservatives disagree, of course, as they have some numbers that they created...?  I'm going to believe the Auditor General here, just because it helps forward my nefarious left wing agenda.

Canada becomes a part of what will most likely turn into an Iranian debacle.  What's the solution?  I have no idea.  This would probably be a whole lot easier if the last 10-12 years didn't happen.

I like to call this the Sarah Palining of politics - where no matter what the question is, you say whatever it is that you want to say as an answer.  Anyhow, apparently our Minister of Environment doesn't know what ozone is.

More bad news on the fighter jets as it sounds like there are some relatively major technical questions that have not been answered.  There's still some time to sort this stuff out, so I wouldn't be too concerned.  But still.  Software that would prevent the planes from bombing friendly troops sounds important enough to delay things.  It seems odd that we would have to wait until 2019 for this feature.

More bad news on the Omnibus crime bill.  "Dear Quebec:  We only care about what you have to say when we're begging for votes.  By the way.  You voted NDP.  Suck it.  Sincerely, Steve."  And...even the jerks who came up with the idea don't know how much the whole thing will cost.

Other people think the destruction of the gun registry is a bit dodgy.  The "Information Commissioner" weighs in.  Stupid civil servants getting in the way of progress!  Gawd.

Holy shit!  Are you kidding me?  The Conservatives want to make it easier for people to conduct a "citizen's arrest" and easier to claim "self defense"?  Ya, there's no chance that this is going to lead to anything bad.  This is not the direction that we want to go in.

Sometimes I love the Huffington Post.  A Conservative MP dozes off in the House of Commons as one of his buddies drones on.

There's just all sorts of things to feel a bit confused by on this.  Free trade with New Zealand.  Dairy tariffs.  It seems like in this day and age of global warming, imported dairy from New Zealand probably isn't the most responsible thing to do.

Tom Haverford is the 1% - Week 27 - Oct 31 - Nov 7

Tom Haverford said the greatest thing the other day.  I'm not exactly sure how it relates to the current financial climate, but it feels about right.  "They say you gotta spend money to make money.  I don't know what went wrong.  We spent all our money."

First up, Steve-O's privacy justification for destroying everything and anything to do with the gun registry is shot down.  It's amazing when people use things that they absolutely hate as an excuse for doing something, itsn't it?  Just wait until he decides to ban freedom because of "the environment".  And once again those crazy "experts" are contradicting the Conservatives.

The Iraqi Information Minister (John Baird) sez "There's no problem with the 54,000 jobs lost last month.  Everything is fine."

Quebec tells the federal government to pound sand on costs associated with the new crime bill.  Which is right up there with Poutine on the list of awesome things that Quebec has done.

So, Canada has decided that it will punish UNESCO for recognizing Palestine by not providing them with any additional funding.  This is kind of why the UN is a bit of a joke.  There's just too many political statements.  Too many vetoes.  Too much deciding to just go along with the stuff that you agree with.

Wow.  It sounds like John Baird is actually taking responsibility for the G8 slush fund.  I'm not exactly sure what that means though.  Maybe he just wants to collect the air miles or something?

Tough on Crime splits the Provinces.  BC, Alberta and New Brunswick on board.  Ontario and Quebec opposed.  Wonder how they'll vote in the next election?

The Conservatives have decided to ban loans to political parties.  On the surface, this seems like a good thing.  More news on how much the Conservatives are ahead with fundraising as well.

And getting down to the serious business of governing, a Conservative MP decides to single out a Justin Trudeau speaking engagement at a Catholic High School (the big leagues) with taunts and name-calling.  I think "Bad Catholic" would be a great name for a hair metal band.  Wow...there's actually a "big beat/techno/christian" duo based on Vancouver called "To Bad Catholics".  My hair metal project will need a new name.

Lots more copyright stuff.  The Conservatives have admitted that their legislation probably isn't in the best interest of the average Canadian, but re-assure sceptics that most of the rules are unenforcable, so they shouldn't worry too much about it.  Oh, and all that doom-and-gloom about piracy destroying the entertainment industry?  Ya, not so much.

The Conservatives are going their own way with a non-french speaking auditor general, even though bilingualism is a prerequisite of the job.  He promises to learn french over the next year.  Why don't they wait until he does until they give him a job?   In other job appointment news, the next supreme court nominee promises to apply for law school once his post is confirmed.

It's a moratorium!  The Conservatives announce a 2-year moratorium on family reunification immigration applications as they attempt to clear the backlog.  At least they have a contingency plan (10 year visas for those affected).  Other moratoriums announced today:
- A two year moratorium on cancer treatments - The contingency pack includes a container of sunblock and a large hat.
- A two year moratorium on drivers licenses - The contingency pack includes a bus pass and a new pair of shoes.

Dismissal of Criticism - Week 23 - Oct 3-11

Just for fun, I plugged "Harper Dismisses Criticism" (no quotations) into the old google machine.  I got 1,960,000 results.  That seems like a lot.

Update - Sorry...this is late, but it's my new favourite story of the week.  Stephen Harper requested 14 tickets for the Jets home opener.  They gave him 2.

I feel like any law is going to have weird, unintended consequences, no matter how noble it's intentions.  So, I'm not a fan of latching on to the obscure losers in the Copyright sweepstakes.  But...still...any law that gives blind people the shaft is probably not a great one.

Are there any consequences for this government?  Was it Patton Oswald who said of George Bush "I'd be happy if he accepted the blame for a chewing gum wrapper on the White House lawn at this point."?  Anyhow, Bob Dechert appears to walk away unscathed from his extra-marital dalliance with a foreign "journalist".

Stephen Harper annonces the demise of the per vote subsidy.  Ya...this is sure to cut back on the number of elections.  We'll see if they turn off the per-person limit as well.  Let's crunch some numbers...this is a bit of a wanky analysis, but we'll use their research.  From last year:

Conservatives - 17.4 Million Earned - 27.9 Million Subsidy - 45.3 Million Total
Liberals - 7 Million Earned - 14.3 Million Subsidy - 21.3 Million Total
NDP - 4.4 Million Earned - 9.5 Million Subsidy - 13.9 Million Total

If you look at the totals, Cons/Libs is about 2.12:1.  Cons/NDP is 3.25/1.  If you look at only the earned amount, Cons/Libs is about 2.48/1 and Cons/NDP is 3.95/1.  So, the Conservatives have increased their advantage, but it's perhaps not as extreme as some may think.  As well, the Conservatives had the most to gain with their increased vote numbers, and then probably the NDP.  Either way, the Liberals were going to take a funding hit.  It's actually probably not super bad news for them, as their competition is no longer getting a much larger cheque than they would have (their 14.3 Million subsidy would have been chopped while the Cons and NDP went up).  Unfortunately, I don't expect them to stop there.  After all, what's more democratic than letting anybody or any entity contribute as much money as they'd like?

I don't know what to think of this next one.  A private member's bill suggests that unions should be subject to financial disclosure laws.  Nobody seems to have a direct idea as to why this is bad, but it merely suggests the possibility of something bad that could potentially happen.  So I'm going to give him a pass on this one.

Why don't we hear more about the Elections Canada case against the Conservatives?  This less-than-mainstream publication points out that the trial is most likely to be delayed again.

The parties actually teamed up to make some headway on something!  The Liberals suggested a national suicide prevention strategy and the Conservatives agreed.

Remember the 50-million-dollar Muskoka slush fund?  Well, turns out Tony Clement was, for some reason, using his personal e-mail account to converse with the Mayor of Huntsville on exactly how he should be spending the money.  We only know this because somebody was able to track down the messages through the Mayor's e-mails.  And the Auditor General agrees that things don't really add up here.

Apparently the crazy new flag law wouldn't apply within Parliament Hill Offices.  As there's a law that supercedes that law that prevents flags from flying within the offices.  So, basically, the Parliamentary Precinct Standards would break the new flag though.  This is an outrage!  Why are the Parliamentary Precinct Standards so anti-Canadian?

Some crazy idiots want to know the details of the new Canada/US North American Security agreement.  Ya...like it matters what the US plans on doing on Canadian soil to increas their security.  Terrorism!  Illegal immigrants!  Isn't that enough information?  Now, what exactly is "perimeter security"?  I don't think they're talking about all of the people that sneak through the arctic.  They're probably not too concerned about boats flooding the various coastlines.  So I think they're probably talking about massive airport crackdowns.  And the "carrot" is that cross-boarder traffic and waits will be reduced?  Ya.  Probably.  And it's only a billion dollars.  Peanuts, really.

Maybe Stephen Harper is on to something with his War of 1812 education project?  It still seems a bit off to me, somehow.  But Canadians knowing a bit more about their history isn't really a bad thing.  I just don't really trust his reasons for doing this.

The Government expands its unwillingness to negotiate on RCMP deals out to Newfoundland and PEI.  I don't think that expanding the number of Provinces pissed off about a situation is a great bargaining tactic.

Bonus culture hits the public sector.  Tony Clement offers up fat bonuses (well...promises not to take away fat bonuses) to public service heads that help him make his cuts.  In similar budget cutting news, the government is expecting $200 in savings for every $1 spent on consultants.  Which nails it for me that these guys don't know what they're doing.  Have you ever worked with consultants?  I have no question that they'll come up with $200 in expected savings.  Unfortunately I expect that $200 will turn into a cup of coffee and a donut once reality hits.

Stephen Harper continues his rhetoric against the evelist of evils...The Canadian Wheat Board.  Indeed, the train "barreling down a prairie track" is going to stop for no-one, so you're better to "get on it than lie on the tracks."  Wait...is this about wheat or about trains?

Finally, this outlines some of the money spent in the last year to influence American decision makers on the Keystone pipeline.  This Government doesn't mind spending money or helping people out.  It just needs to be about oil.

Government Mandated Truth - Week 8 - June 20-27

I'm sure nothing will come of it, but it's been announced that the RCMP is looking in to complaints on G8 spending. Which probably means that somebody at the RCMP read something about it on the Internet. What bothers me the most is John Baird's outright dismissal here, calling it a "public relations stunt". I'm sick and tired of these yabbos blaming everything on the person asking the question. That's actually the opposite of accountibility.

Next, the Conservatives target climate scientists at Environment Canada with job cuts. Well. Climate Change doesn't exist. Why would you waste money studying it?

Canada continues to embarrass itself by officially denying a UN declaration of asbestos as hazardous. And since the declaration has to be unanimous, there will therefore be no declaration of Asbestos as hazardous by the UN. And we complain when China or Russia step in and derail things with their Security Council vote. Even India, Vietnam, Kazakhstan and Kyrgyzstan came around to changing their stance on this item. Actually, this probably opens up some Harper spin. "Canada Valiantly Opposes Baltic/Near East Asbestos Denial Axis at UN Summit". (In the end, the axis joined up with Canada. But I'm not writing a whole new paragraph just for that.) Add this to the lengthening list of "Strange Stephen Harper Obsessions."


And another case of "this is the truth because I say so." The Conservatives call the investigation of detainee abuse in Afghanistan closed because nothing in their redacted documents indicates that anything happened. Missing from the records...anything deemed legal advice or related to cabinet confidence. It would seem to me that any important discussion would probably be related to one of these two things.

Oh man. This is like...our two favourite things combined into one topic of awesomeness. Christy Clark...encourages Senate reform...and the addition of 10 Senate seats for British Columbia. Actually...she encourages abolition of the Senate, but if that doesn't work, then she wants to make it bigger. Ya...that doesn't make any sense at all.

And then...What the hell? Gordon Campbell is going to be the Canadian Ambassador to England? Sorry. "High Commissioner". Ya. We should probably reward criminally convicted premieres run out of office on a rail.

After an NDP filibuster (I didn't even know that was possible in Canada), the Conservatives passed back to work legislation for Canada Post employees. This article points out that this is the sort of thing that's supposed to happen in Parliament. I think the Conservatives were probably upset that they might once again miss a chance to stick it to striking workers.

And finally, John Baird begins his new role as International Courier with a quick trip to Libya.

Past Issues - Week 6 - June 6-13

So, Canada has decided to pledge 5-million dollars to fight drug crime in Central/Latin America. And Canada goes on to say that radical suggestions like legalizing drugs won't be the answer. I guess it's alright for Mexicans and Columbians to kill themselves to feed North American drug habits...but we shouldn't consider radical changes because there's "a lot of red flags about moving in that direction." As well "many in law enforcement, many crime fighters, have serious reservations about going that route." Yes. Because they are all impartial on that argument.

Oh. And John Baird/Stephen Harper actually changed their minds on Israel. Now the US was correct and the 1967 borders are okay. What happened? How can you so suddenly change your mind after so publicly saying the opposite? Here it is. Right here. The opposite. Eleven days ago.

And here we have praise for Harper "following his convictions" on Israel, even at the expense of votes and international support. What a thing to admire in a national leader. Ignoring the general will of the country/world and following your own convictions.

But, amazingly, this isn't the stupidest thing written by the Globe and Mail this week. The story of Aaron Rome's suspension keeps rising to the top, some 14-15 hours after it happened. And apparently the Canucks are the most hated team in the league (because the Globe and Mail says so. And the Chicago Blackhawks.) This is why I root for the underdog. I can't stand the politicians jumping on board and the journalists piling on. I can't stand the fascination with celebrity bandwagon jumpers and I don't care if the rest of Canada likes the Canucks. Go away everybody. Let me watch hockey.

Finally, Stephen Harper gets called out officially for the lack of transparency on G8 spending. There's not much else to say about it.